I Still Feel You
by AddienaTheBlueSpirit
Summary: He wondered if she remembered him.Lying on his bed, he imagined that she couldn't.When he woke up he knew the dream had been right, and that just made it all the more painful...a Series of Post-Fang Song-fic...Rated T for Dark Concepts...Requests welcome.
1. I Still Feel You

**Addiena: Hey, everybody in Fanfic Land, It's me, Addien of Camelot, also known as Addiena, and Fang…we're here with this awesome post-Fang Song-Fic…**

**Fang: Because, you know, it wouldn't be a proper Fic unless I'm being held against my will… by the way, aren't you forgetting something.**

**Addiena: I own nothing… why? Because I'm not Collin Raye or James Patterson. **sobs****

**Fang: **Pats me on the back** Now doesn't that feel better?**

**Addiena: **wipes away the tears** NO! It most certainly does not. **

**Fang: **Rolls his eyes** Look, I know this is bad timing seeing as you're all depressed and everything, but even though I'm currently your hostage…**

**Addiena: More like my guest who I'm not allowing to leave…but continue…**

**Fang: **eye roll** yeah, like I said, I'm your hostage, but really, do you have to keep me with the vampire?**

**Addiena: we have no proof that the bite marks in your neck are related in any way to the fact that there is a coffin in my attic. **

**Fang: The guy **_**apologized**_** for it!**

**Addiena: Then why are you mad?**

**Fang: oh, I don't know…maybe because I was attacked by a vampire in my sleep!**

**Addiena: well, maybe you should try not to smell so delicious!**

**Fang: I cannot believe you're defending the Vampire!**

**Addiena: Why shouldn't I? It's not like he'll actually kill you…**

**Fang: **shakes head in despair** Can we just get to the story? **

**Addiena: Fine with me… you're the one who's going on about Fred…**

**Fang: **raises his eyebrow skeptically** Fred? Really?**

**Addiena: Hello! Trying to post a Song-Fic here!**

**Fang: then post! Who and what is it about any why?**

**Addiena: You'll see if you let me post it!**

_**I can still feel you…**_

_It's that feeling that someone  
Is standing behind me  
And I turn around and there's no one there  
And it's the sensation  
That someone just whispered  
Yeah and I still hear your voice but you're not really here_

In the city there is a boy with black hair who blends in to the midnight sky. He can feel the girl who had stolen his heart years before but he knew it was impossible; he'd left her behind all those weeks ago, but it felt more like an eternity since he'd last seen her. It was his own damn fault but he still cried…saying good-bye hadn't been easy on him. That's why he'd done it the way he had. Writing that letter had been hard enough…he hoped she would still love him. Because deep down the boy knew she shouldn't. So hearing her laughter on the wind, he allowed his heart to break day by day…knowing there was no one there to pick up the pieces.

_Your memory is like a ghost  
and my heart is its host_

__In the darkest corners of a mansion, hidden deep in the woods, a girl with golden hair, and golden skin had faded to grey. She could still feel him; she could sense him behind her, knowing all the while when she would turn around he wouldn't be there. He hadn't been for months. She wanted to forget him, but she knew that through trying to she would kill her heart even more. Juliet never forgot Romeo, she figured. Juliet had died for her love before she would have moved on. This girl, well, she would do the same no matter how much he'd hurt her by leaving, she would die if it meant that she could protect him.

_I can still feel you just as close as skin  
Every now and then  
All by myself, in a crowded room, or my empty bed  
There's a place you've touched  
With your love no one gets close to  
I can still feel you,_

_I can still feel you, _

_I can still feel you, _

_I can still feel you _

The boy grew up in that city apartment; he had changed. The city had been what destroyed him, or so he claimed…but he knew he'd destroyed himself when he'd left every one behind…especially her. He would try to be reckless … he said he did it to forget the golden girl, but every time he nosedived into Central Park, he could hear her scream at him to pull back. To stop. And he would, just in time. She would disappear then, but the shadow of the boy he'd once been would stay, etched into his memory. A constant reminder of his biggest mistake. On those nights he'd cry himself to sleep. Because he hated who he had become…and what he'd done back when he'd been someone else… that much.

_You said you'd love me forever  
Then you said it's over  
And left me without the missing link  
I thought I'd forget you  
But I guess I forgot to  
And lately I've been too confused to think  
When I reach for someone new  
It's like I'm touching you _

Everyone else who had been hurt by him went to her for help, only to realize that she wasn't quiet herself. She didn't have the answers, and not just on what to do without him, but for anything. They all felt lost and abandoned, not just by him, but by her as well; because without him, she had nothing to help her focus. All she did was sit there and think about whether he would still be waiting for her in twenty years like he'd promised. As she works to complete her destiny and save the world, she doesn't really feel much, the physical pain she went through on a daily basis was pale in comparison to what he felt every time she remembered how much she loved him and how much he'd hurt her. There was no physical pain that was greater than the emotional one he'd caused her to suffer on a daily basis.

_I can still feel you just as close as skin  
Every now and then  
All by myself, in a crowded room, or my empty bed  
There's a place you've touched  
With your love no one gets close to  
I can still feel you, I can still feel you, I can still feel you, I can still feel you _

He'd been one of them… one of the…the…what had they been called? He saw them on the news, but the sound had been off. He also saw their pictures in the paper, but the sound She had been one of the Whatcha-ma-call-it's too. He wondered if she remembered him. Lying on his bed, he imagined that she couldn't. He dreamt that night of his old friends…

In his dream they'd found him, they surrounded him, "why?" they chorus, "Why, Fang? Why?" their voices echoed around the room. As he looked at himself, his old self, staring at his new self from the group of his friends, and that other guy...old What's-his-Face, who'd convinced him to leave in the first place… they all stared at him as the old him told the new him quiet bluntly... "I hate you. You Bastard. Look at what you've done. This, all of this, was yours once, and you gave it away because _that" _the old him pointed to what's-his-face, "told you that you weren't worthy, that by staying you would get them killed. You deserve this, you're a _Moron_. "

When he woke up he knew his old self had been right, and that just made the dream all the more painful.

_In everything that moves  
in everything I do  
I can still feel you just as close as skin  
Every now and then _

She wanted him to come back. But she knew that it was stupid to think he would. She loved him. She knew nothing, and no one could change that or take his place. She'd tried to fall for Dylan, but really, she had never liked him. How could anyone love someone that they don't even like? Especially when it's the person who sent away the most important person in her life…even if it was just to protect her? By leaving her, he'd made her more vulnerable. By trying to protect her, he'd left her with a never healing pain…

_All by myself, in a crowded room, or my empty bed  
There's a place you've touched  
With your love no one gets close to  
I can still feel you,_

There is nothing left of him…Not anything recognizable at least… his emotional and mental states were concerned. There was still that scar from that one time she'd saved his life… and the scar from the other time she'd saved it as well. But really, those were just more scars to him. He looked in the mirror at the man he'd become, and punched it, because he hated the man that looked back. The man that looked back didn't deserve her; he didn't deserve any of them really. Iggy…Nudge…The Gasman…Angel…Maximum…Even what's-his-face deserved better in his mind…and he hated what's-his-face. It was time to see her again, he thought setting out…but maybe, he should have stayed home…

_I can still feel you,_

There was no way of describing the rush she felt when she saw the black shape flying towards her… she couldn't believe he'd actually come…none of them could. Smiling, they waited for him to reach them.

_I can still feel you,_

He landed in the open field… couldn't see them, he didn't notice. And then he saw the patches of newly grown grass in six otherwise empty dry spots in the ground…

_I can still feel you _

"I told you I'd come back…" he said, his voice cracking. She started crying…

"Yes, Fang…You did…" she replied rapping her arms around him. The others joined in the hug, even Dylan put his hand on Fang's back in greeting.

_Oh I can still feel you_

He felt a chill, like there were someone's arms around him, but he couldn't see anyone. That's when he saw the photograph clipped out of a newspaper; the head line was still visible in the frame "Flock Gives Their Lives for Survival of the Human Race", he breaks down and starts to cry.

"I'm so sorry!" he whispers…but he hears it carry…

He could have sworn that he heard her voice saying "Me Too…" as the wind swirled around him.

**The End**

**Fang: you make me sound Emo…**

**Addiena: Well if you really were in that situation wouldn't you go Emo?**

**Fang: Maybe… **looks Sheepishly away****

**Addiena: What's wrong now? **Rolls eyes**  
Fang: **Sniffles** Now you've got me all sad and worried that the Flock is dead!**

**Addiena: **sighs** You do know that I made this story up right? I mean come one…I wrote that you sympathized with Dylan…**

**Fang: **sighs before returning to normal** do I still have to sleep in the Vampire infested attic?**

**Addiena: Look. If I have a talk with Fred and ask him to stop biting you, would you stop bugging me about sharing the room with him?**

**Fang: No, but it's a start.**

**Addiena: **Face palms** fine, let's go up to the attic and lecture a Vampire about how it's rude to bite people without their permission…But first…**

**Fang: Please hit the little Button that says "Review" so Addie will tell Fred the Vampire that Just because I have a pulse, doesn't mean I'm there so he can have a midnight snack…**

**Addiena: also…If you have a request for a Fang-Centric Song Fic, Let me know! **

**Fang: Because I'm sick of waking up slightly more anemic than when I went to bed…**

**Addiena: What he means is…Review, or I'll let the Vampire keep using Fang as a Buffet…**

**Fang: Review… **turns to me** and please don't call me that…**

**Addiena: You know you love it…**

**Fang: That's where you're wrong…**


	2. The Only One

The Only One

By Addien Of Camelot (aka: Addiena)

**Fang: yo. Fang here. In the E.R. With Addiena and Fred the Random Vampire.**

**Addiena: **laughs evilly****

**Fred: **Thick British Accent** we're here because Addiena decided to torment poor Fang.**

**Fang: she tied a boulder to my ankles when I was about to jump off the roof for a fly. **

**Fred: Now both of Fang's legs are broken…**

**Fang: And Addiena is too busy laughing at my pain to post. **

**Fred: so we're doing it for her. **

**Fang: Despite the fact that I'm getting both my legs set into casts and have a neck brace on.**

**Addiena: **momentarily stops laughing** You forgot that I don't Own Max Ride, or The only one by Evanescence…**Returns to her Psychotic Laughter** **

_You know you're not the only one_

Fang flew through the sky; he knew he still had his purpose. Max was okay with him gone, maybe not emotionally, but physically she was out of harm's way. So why did he feel like he'd made the biggest mistake of his life?

He had the starts of a new flock, sure, but without Max his life seemed empty…He noticed Alita's silver wing come into view and then fall back. He somehow, having her around just made him feel so much more alone. Seeing Max again would be the only cure for his heart ache, but at the same time, he knew that waiting 20 years would be the death of him. __

When they all come crashing down, mid-flight  
you know you're not the only one

Somehow Max would get through it, she could handle herself for the next 20 years…Then again Max wasn't called the queen of lies for nothing. She missed Fang; to her it felt like she was trying to fly with only one of her wings.

Because that's what she was, she was flying through life without her best friend, her soul mate; her right wing had been lopped off. She knew she wasn't alone though, the whole Flock was flying with one of their wings hacked off, and it was all Fang's fault.

_When they're so alone they find a back door out of life  
you know you're not the only one_

Alita watched Fang's wings snap shut… Fang. She dropped from the sky as well, her large silver wings tucked under as she blacked out.

Alita. Fang grabbed her hand and flew upward with her. They did this every time, but it doesn't matter, he'll try again, and she'll save him, because she's too stubborn to admit she needs him, and he's too depressed to notice it himself.

Someday, Fang wouldn't be able to pull out of his free fall in time to catch her, and when that day came, Alita knew she wouldn't waste the time to save herself…when that day came Fang would realize how much he'd needed her after all.__

We're all grieving  
Lost and bleeding

Dylan was waisting his time, he just wanted to succeed, being the same as someone else made it so that you would desperately desire to be better. Only Dylan was a failure. Max was saving the world and he was babysitting a blind guy and a bunch of younger kids. A bunch of depressed younger kids who kept crying over a guy who'd abandoned them. Dylan was fairly sure by that point that he would never understand these inferior experiments.

But deep down he did understand, and he felt it in his chest, and his heart. Why? Why did he feel like these poor kids' pain was his fault…oh yeah, the guy had left because he'd shown up. __

All our lives, we've been waiting  
for someone to call our leader

Hawk and Papillion had been on their own for so long they had jumped at the chance to join Fang's Flock. The pair watched the interaction of Fang and Alita; it wasn't hard to miss the relationship. He would start to fall; she would fall too, saving him by having him save her.

The twins weren't sure if it was Sheer genius or lack of sanity on Alita's part. Maybe it was both. Papillion glanced at her brother as the two went back to their unspoken agreement of I save you, you save me.

_All your lies, I'm not believing  
Heaven shine a light down on me_

Max didn't want to believe it when Angel said Fang had died. Fang's death wasn't supposed to happen. Maybe that was because Angel had read it in Jeb the Lying Jerk's mind. They were still meeting in 20…no, 18 years. He couldn't be dead. Not when she needed him alive so badly.

She needed to know the answers, but she wasn't even sure of the questions anymore. She wasn't even sure if there ever had been any. It had all been laid out for her. Save the world. Fall for Dylan. Max was sick of her life being predestined. No, Max Ride was going to save the world, but she swore, then and there, she would never love Dylan. No matter how Perfect for her he really was.__

So afraid to open your eyes, hypnotized  
you know you're not the only one

For the first time in the 3 years since he'd left Max, Fang just wanted to understand. He wanted to know why falling to his death made him feel so alive. He didn't think about the fact that he could hear Max scream abuse at him every time, he didn't think about the way he had such an effect on Alita that she would hurtle herself after him. No, those things went unnoticed with him. He just felt…right.

It was sick. He wanted to change it. Only this time, as Alita went hurtling passed he didn't pull out intime to save her. She was falling so fast that he could never catch up. Alita. Her wings snapped out suddenly. "You didn't catch me in time." Her voice sounded hurt. And he knew, that this was one of those times that "I'm sorry" wouldn't be able to fix.

He looked at Papillion and Hawk for answers and in response Papillion spoke her first words of English... and those four words echoed in his mind as he flew through the night in an awkward silence with his Flock…

"You broke the rules."

_Never understood this life and you're right, I don't deserve  
But you know I'm not the only one_

Dylan felt completely at a loss, he wanted to understand Max, and why she wouldn't move on already. She wasn't seriously waiting 17 more years to see if she still loved that jerk Fang, was she?

It helped him of course, when he heard Iggy sit down next to him and say something that didn't have to do with missing Fang. For the first time, someone else was complaining about Max's insane obsession with someone who obviously hadn't cared. "I get it, you think Max is going to get hurt by him again… don't you? It's okay if you do…I feel the same way".

_We're all grieving  
Lost and bleeding_

Alita just wanted Fang to catch her. That's all. She didn't want to take the place of Maximum Ride. She didn't want him to fall in love with her. She just wanted to know that Fang, the first person…the only person…who had ever even pretended like he cared, to have her back. She had fallen for him every time he started to fall…and normally he'd catch her. But not tonight. Fang had almost ended it. No, not his life…well, maybe, but that wasn't what she had been thinking of. He'd almost ended their game, their unspoken agreement. Because she'd almost hit the ground.

No, Alita Black had never wanted Fang to fall for her…she just wanted to know her only real friend had her back.__

All our lives, we've been waiting  
For someone to call our leader

Iggy wasn't the only one who agreed with Dylan. Everyone else felt it was time for Max to move on. The only problem was in convincing Max. She was set on winning Fang back, waiting the remaining 16 years and hope he showed when and where he'd said he would.

Deep down they all secretly hoped he would show. They just hoped that Max wouldn't take the risk of him not making it and getting hurt even worse.

_All your lies, I'm not believing  
Heaven shine a light down on me_

Papillion wasn't one to speak…she had only spoken once in English, and even in French, she only spoke through her and her brother's twin telepathy. So her outburst 5 years before was a momentous thing indeed. Fang still had no clue what rules he'd broken. But he knew it had to do with when he didn't catch Alita, and that scared him even more than Itex's new Destroyers.

Catch Alita. He told himself that every day…Far too late to change the fact that Alita was gone. Not dead gone, but she might as well have been. She was just a hollow shell of blond and silver. "Alita." He said. Alita's response was both unexpected and regretted. Not to mention it confused him as much if not more than Papillion and her broken rules the year before.

She didn't even take the time to look at him when she said, "I hate you, Fang. You made me break my promise." The unspoken "you made me save myself" didn't go unnoticed this time.__

Don't look down; don't look into the eyes  
of the world beneath you

Max flew for the first time since the Flock said she should move on. Since they'd said she needed to clear her head. It's not so much that she didn't understand their concern. She just didn't care. She didn't look down, but if she had she would have seen her attackers coming, if she had, she would have seen the downfall of the Great Maximum Ride.

_Don't look down, you'll fall down  
you'll become their sacrifice_

Fang. Alita was still in shock that he had changed so much in the 5 years after her "I hate you". Her shock wasn't why the Erasers got her however. It was Fang. He tried to protect them. Alita had just given up…not because the thought of being hostage thrilled her, but because she needed to do it, for Fang. She needed to make sure that Fang was on that cliff in 6 years. She wasn't important, Fang could go just as easily without her. But he had to be there, because he needed to catch the girl waiting for him if she fell.__

Right or wrong, can't hold on  
to the fear that I'm lost without you

Max knew that she had to escape. Fang was waiting for her on the cliff. She had to get out of this cell, she had to be there. She had to show up. Iggy was in the Itex branch suddenly with the Flock.

"I thought you guys were mad at me." she stated.

"Shows how much you know." It was Dylan, Iggy adding to the end, "We just don't want to see you hurt."

_If I can't feel, I'm not mine  
I'm not real_

Fang and his Flock soared to the Hawk's Cliff. She hadn't shown. He knew that he shouldn't have expected her to show up. He'd just hoped that she would after Alita's sacrifice. Then he would know that Alita hadn't given herself up for nothing.

Suddenly, Max and her flock could be seen flying from the other direction. __

All our lives, we've been waiting  
for someone to call our leader

Fang had shown, both of the Flocks breathed a sigh of relief as Max and Fang embraced mid-air. At last, their leaders were whole again.

_All your lies, I'm not believing  
Heaven shine a light down on me_

Fang said how happy he was to see Max, and how much he missed her. But in his rush of excitement from seeing his old Flock, he'd let his guard down, and Angel could see everything. Of course, Angel knew that Fang was aware of her mind probing.

"Angel, get out of my head." He said over Max's shoulder.

"That Alita, she gave herself to the White Coats so the rest of you could escape and meet us here…We should go find her and rescue her…" Angel replied.

"Yeah, that way we could thank her for helping reunite us." Said Max.

**Addiena: I forgot how good that was…**

**Fang: I didn't, if I'm stuck posting something for you while in physical, mental, and emotional pain, it's going to be some of your better stuff. **

**Fred: can we wrap this up…I'd like the sun to be down while we finish this…**

**Fang: Right…Read and Review? **

**Addiena: so I don't have to cause him more physical pain…**

**Fred: and so they get me home before Sunrise…**

**Fang: Yeah, if you don't want Addiena to kill me and the Random Vamp here, Please Review!**


End file.
